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http://www.reddywhip.org/~taipan
Sadie: There's a beautiful taipan snake on your homepage, which you describe as "a vicious, extremely venomous snake that lives in northern Australia." What is it about these snakes that does it for you? Taipan: "Actually, it's more my online nickname that I've had way before I discovered I was kinky. Back in the days of bulletin board services before Usenet, IRC and web chat became really popular; it was the name I went by. Sorry to be anticlimactic, but it was randomly chosen." Sadie: Well that's kind of a bummer since I'm a snake lover myself. How about the significance of your dragon tattoo? Why not the taipan? Taipan: "Now dragons are more my totem animal. I identify with the noble, wise and powerful eastern dragons, more than the nasty maiden-eating western variety." Sadie: You are the webmaster of Leatherpage.com, one of the best-known BDSM publications. How did you get involved with Leatherpage? Does editor Joe Gallagher flog you if you don't code fast enough? Taipan: "Well, to be accurate, I'm more just a web boy. Back when I won my title, and I began to look for ways that I could help out and be involved with the gay leather community, I saw that Joe was looking for volunteers. And if Joe were to flog me when I was slow, nothing would ever get done!" Sadie: You won the title of New England Leatherboy 2002. Can you tell me a little bit about this title, and what it means to you? Taipan: "Well first off, The LeatherSir/Leatherboy title is the reincarnation of the old Drummer title. Although the contest looks at each individual's contributions and commitment to the leather community, there is also a strong emphasis on the Sir/boy relationship. One of the things being graded so to speak, are the interactions you have with your title Sir. Although I don't really consider myself a 'service submissive,' this was a great opportunity for me to be exposed to the D/s world, and I really enjoyed that. "Like many people who enter the title circuit, at first I did it because the bar and my leather club needed help. After I won the title, I had to research exactly what I was supposed to do with the darn thing. This caused me to go out and meet local community leaders, run events and fund raisers and be involved in the leather community in a way that I probably wouldn't have been if I had never won the title." Sadie: You refer to yourself as a "player" rather than a top or bottom. Why this delineation and what does it mean? Taipan: "Well, I should start out by reciting the age-old saying: 'there is no one way to do leather.' Now for me, personally. I believe that the whole of leather knowledge: BDSM technique, the mating rituals, bar etiquette, scene etiquette, etc. should be taught individual to individual, Daddy to boy, Master to slave, Older generation to younger. "I bottom because very rough sex turns me on of course, but I'm also trying to learn the knowledge and skills that the previous generation has to offer. As I said before, I don't consider myself a service submissive, but I will enter in a relationship where I am serving a Sir in order to learn from him. The metaphor I like to use is that of a knight's squire. Keeping his armor clean, tending to his horse. Perhaps one day I can become a 'knight' too. "I also like to initiate other people in this process. In the short time that I've been in the community I've learned a couple of things. I top people less experienced than I, because hopefully I can spark the same flame in them that my mentors awakened in me. "Now having said all that high falootin theory and stuff; it's also helpful when I meet a cute guy at the bar. Switches have all the fun." Sadie: You recently moved in with your new Daddy. Can you tell me a little bit about this relationship? Taipan: "I am SO lucky to have met my daddy. He is incredibly skilled in BDSM technique, he is also good on the sensual/chemistry side (just cuz you can tie a knot or crack a whip, doesn't mean you're a fun player). I'm learning so much from him. Basically, it's a power imbalance relationship. I try to keep him happy and accommodate his needs, and he teaches me not only how to be a better leatherman, but also how to be a better man." Sadie: One of your diaries included the comment that, "Boy T makes me jealous sometimes... he's a much better boy than I. He offered to replace my drink, got me a chair to sit on several times, was constantly on his best behaviour and trying to make his daddy happy... I need to work on that." If you aren't doing these things, what do you consider your gifts in being a successful submissive? Taipan: "Every power imbalance relationship is different. My Daddy, luckily, is not a stickler for protocol. He wanted a boy who could take a decent amount of rough play, and had an open mind. The service side, I'm learning slowly. But in this case, the boy T that I refer to in my diary was a grade A archetypal boy. Always service with a smile." Sadie: You describe what sounds like a real moment when, "he beats you, and your knees buckle, he asks if you want to continue, and you look up at him, tears streaming down your face and tell him not to stop." Was this real? How did you get to this moment, and what happened afterward? Taipan: "Yes this is real. I personally believe that trying to overcome your own limitations during play is an act of love for your Dominant. In cruder words 'take 10 more for Daddy.' I want to make my Daddy proud, I want him to know that I personally don't think I can go any further, but I trust him so implicitly that I will let him continue." Sadie: Your list of BDSM interests is pretty extensive. What haven't you done that you still hunger to do? Taipan: "I've done most basic pain play. I sort of had a laundry list when I 'came out in leather,' and I ran around from top to top until I had done most of the things on it. My two weaknesses are butt play and uncomfortable or long-term bondage. I would like to become more comfortable with my ass, because I believe that a good gay submissive should enjoy being fucked. As for bondage, I would like to try longer scenes and less PC bondage. It makes me feel like a failure when I have to complain during a scene that the bondage is uncomfortable. Taking safety issues into account, there are certain times when I 'safe out' from bondage even though I could handle being uncomfortable for a little bit longer." Sadie: If any of us had a moment of doubt about what you dig, your webpage specifies pain, and lots of it. Where does this much pain take you? Why this particular kink instead of some other flavor or flavors in the BDSM ice cream bin? Taipan: "Ahhh... When I'm able to calm my rational mind down, stop fighting it and just ride the waves of pain, I'm somewhere else completely. A very good place. Very tranquil and euphoric. Okay I'm an endorphin junkie. I know other people get to that place through inescapable bondage or servicing a Dominant's boots. I've only been able to get to that place through pain. I'm also not embarrassed to admit there's a macho element to it. How much can I take? Can I take more than I could before? Sometimes, I play games with the top. Can he break me, or can I look at him completely stoically while he beats the **** out of me." Sadie: You write that, "I see my scars and marks that I get during play as positive symbols and reminders. Symbols of my personal journey in leather, obstacles overcome, limits expanded. Reminders of very hot scenes, or scenes where I perhaps wasn't as a safe as I needed to be. I have three vertical scars, two on my left arm and one across my chest." Where do you draw the line on scars and marks? Taipan: "Before, I would let just anyone mark me as long as it wasn't in an extremely visible place... face, neck and lower arms. Out of respect for my Daddy, he is the only one who can mark me now." Sadie: In one of your stories you write that your partner did not go in for "fluffy" bondage. Would that be as in using cuffs lined in fur and so on? What kind of bondage do you prefer? Taipan: "Well, I should start by saying that my Daddy is very experienced in bondage. By fluffy I meant 'PC bondage.' Rope cuffs that don't tighten, checking for circulation every few minutes, never crossing the windpipe with rope. Once you know the 'rules' and why they exist, you can break them. Like any edge play, both my Daddy and I are aware of the risks: nerve damage and possible asphyxiation. But the fear of these add a spice to the play that isn't there normally. When I top with rope, I go for more decorative shibari, Celtic knots, and elaborate body harnesses. And I always play on the safe side. I'm still pretty new at this after all." Sadie: Piercings and needles are your biggest physical fear. What is your greatest emotional fear? Taipan: "Right now, my biggest fear is disappointing my daddy. Kills me to complain during play, or to screw up dinner." Sadie: You wrote that, "Private play is much different from play party play is much different from inferno play." What are the major differences between these for you? What is "inferno play?" Taipan: "When I play in private, bottoming or topping, all my focus in on the other person. I want to make sure that in either scenario, they're having a good time. I have a lot of faith in myself as a player, and most of the people at your average leatherbar are not players per se, so it's not that much of a distraction to play in that kind of setting. Now, that diary reference was about Inferno, an invite only run put on by the Chicago Hellfire Club. The caliber of attendee at Inferno, Delta, or other runs like that is much higher then the average barfly. I found that in that setting, I'm constantly worrying; is someone going to rush over to my scene and tell me I'm not doing something right? Or will people comment on the intensity or level of difficulty? I can't focus on pleasing my partner. This is probably due to the fact that I'm still pretty young in my journey in leather. Hopefully, when I've been around a little bit longer, it will go away." Sadie: One of your interests is spirituality. Do you extend this into the realm of BDSM and spirituality? How would you describe your philosophy? Taipan: "I'm inclined to think the divine is an internal force- that human beings are able to master their weaknesses and that nothing is unattainable. By pushing my play to higher and higher levels, I gain self-confidence. If I can handle my back being shredded by a single tail whip and not run away or beg the top to stop, then giving a progress report in front of my boss and the boss's boss is child's play." Sadie: You describe your spiritual journey as, "having complete mastery over your body and mind, and coping with hell put right here on earth." Do you express this side of yourself most when Dominant or Submissive? "Hell" on earth is a pretty strong description, what specifically do you mean? Taipan: "When I top, I don't try to break a person's boundaries or 'train' them, as much as I like to have my own boundaries broken. When I top, I want to give the novice bottom an amazing experience and have them come back. My aim is to hopefully recruit a new kinkster." Sadie: Is there anything else you'd like to share with our readers? Taipan: "The one most important thing I've learned in my short journey in leather is that organizing fundraisers and throwing events and contests are ways you can help out the leather community. A much better way is to be open and inclusive to new guys who show interest in the community but are afraid to take that first step. Each individual has complete control over the face of the leather community and the direction it's taking. If you find a decent, honorable person who wants to learn more, be patient with them and teach them. We all were newbies once." Sadie: Thank you very much! Taipan: "Thank YOU :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sensuous
Sadie is the author of It's Not
About the Whip: Love, Sex, and Spirituality in the BDSM Scene (http://www.trafford.com/robots/03-0551.html).
She is the founder and leader (1999 - 2001) of Copyright 2003 Sadie Sez Publications
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